Finding Joy, Giving Hope
February 14, 2009 by Natalie
My daughter’s name is Sofia. Raising her is my job. I have other jobs, which make money, but she is my main thing. Realizing this has helped me take time to see the details. I welcomed her when she came because I chose to be optimistic about this world, to have hope. So it is my duty to give her hope, and the tools with which she might follow and attain her dreams.
Sofia goes to a small school where they teach children to use their gifts, intelligence, imagination, and to understand that they are an important contributing part of their community. They are taught, in short, to belong. “Your talent is God’s gift to you; what you do with it is your gift to him,” reads a placard on the wall in the entryway. Hypocrisy and cynicism are left by the wayside.
I am obsessive and protective of this aspect of her upbringing, because I was never taught that I belonged anywhere, that anything I did really mattered, and here I remain, somewhat adrift, up some kind of creek with no paddle. My biting and cynical wit, a necessary and hard won tool of survival when I was growing up, is doing me little good at the moment, in the world I’m trying to create for my daughter and myself.
It is so easy to let things slip when you’re angry or guilty or overburdened. Clarity and detail fall by the wayside, and these qualities make up a child’s universe. Ignore the detail, and to a certain extent you no longer see the child.
Ultimately and unsurprisingly, I am one of those parents who seeks for her child what she herself missed out on. In our particular case: a sense of freedom, faith, and self-trust. I consider them essential tools. Joy is the final tool, because otherwise what is the point of it all? I have, at least, been gifted with that capability, and the strength to sometimes capture it back from misfortune.
Children are our hope and our test. By raising them well we can mend the past; that is our hope. Our test? By simply existing they hold a mirror up to us, that we can see ourselves and make amends – if we are brave enough to look. ~NC
This is the first of many from Natalie. Thank you Natalie. We sincerely appreciate you taking the time to contribute to our efforts. Tyler Hartle
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